Have you ever been in a state of anxiety, frozen between two decisions? How about in the middle of a life transition or change where you can’t quite access your old self, but your new self hasn’t fully arrived yet? Are you standing with two feet on the bridge, not sure whether to turn back or keep walking because you can’t see what’s on the other side of it? Well, chances are, you have been or will be in one of these tough spots at some point in your life because the universe is full of duality, uncertainty and change. The way in which we ride that uncomfortable feeling is how we grow, right? But sometimes it can feel like the farthest thing from growth. In fact, it often feels like a panic attack, being lost, hopeless, or depressed. I know this is true, because I have experienced it. But I am here to tell you, loves, to HANG ON!
Something amazing happens when we allow two opposing choices or feelings or pulls to exist at the same time…a third one emerges that integrates the two! It may not be obvious that what shows up it is a brand new choice or option or solution at first, but it is. If we hang on through the waves of confusion, tension, and pain, eventually our psyches work things out and something new presents itself. This new solution can also come in the form of an attitude shift that we couldn’t previously access in the midst of our anxiety. As hard as it is and uncomfortable as it is to just let what is BE, I am forced to learn again and again that the only way to flow with the unknowns of life is to go through the pain, meet it, befriend it, and wait it out. Emotions, like energy, need a space to express themselves. By giving them room, we allow them to dialogue. This can be very uncomfortable as they are sometimes conflicting, but this process is what the good stuff comes out of — the burst of insight, the new ideas, the BREAKTHROUGHS. Without holding the tension of oppositions in life, we skip over the good stuff and plow numbly through life, avoiding and hiding from our own pain, which will inevitably resurface until we can allow it to exist.
Ideally, we would all be able to face the vulnerability of not having a clear solution in sight gracefully. But alas, we are humans, so we are more likely to trip, stumble, and bump into some poor bystanders as we try to find our way back to trust and center. We are all works in progress and so we must be gentle on ourselves. With self-care and understanding, we can be humbled rather than ashamed when life asks us to have more awareness of our actions.
I am asking you to trust that there is a solution, a path, and a way coming into being right now. Hang on a little longer so it can come to you! If we run away from the pain, feel compelled to fix the problem, or jump to assumptions about the unknown, we miss out on the opportunity of an integrated solution; we force a false solution instead. So go ahead and let your psyche do the work. Trust that all is well and just keep breathing. This is the time to do whatever you can to relax and bring joyful feelings into your world, even if it’s as small as watching a funny YouTube video that makes you laugh for a few minutes. During stressful times, these “breaks” are really important!